


Open up you Heart (and let love in)

by Sadlyamundane



Series: 911 Lone Star Tumblr Prompts [1]
Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020), 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020) RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, TK is a little broken but Carlos loves him anyways
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:29:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23876959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sadlyamundane/pseuds/Sadlyamundane
Summary: Prompt: could you please write smt full of angst? I'm a sucker for angst but with a happy ending please😂 Maybee Carlos wants to take care of Tk but Tk being scared of his feelings and push away Carlos in a very hurtful way (like "who do you think you are/ you are nothing to me/leave me alone kind of thing) I don't know, just too much angst with regretful tk"No" Carlos is stubborn and on most days TK would cave into warmth and his touch and the let him clear the skies and bring the sunshine in but he can't do today, not when he knows the inevitable."Just go, I don't want to see you anymore" and he knows he's breaking Carlos' heart but better that than his own. "I don't c-care about you and I don't want you to care about me"
Relationships: Carlos Reyes/TK Strand
Series: 911 Lone Star Tumblr Prompts [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1720810
Comments: 6
Kudos: 162





	Open up you Heart (and let love in)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not very good at angst but i tried.   
> I apologize in advance for all spelling and grammatical errors.

Everything between TK and Carlos was great. TK hadn't be this happy in a long time. Carlos was everything TK didn't know he needed. He was smart and attractive, charming and stubborn, he was an amazing cook and great in bed and most importantly he was patient.  
He was there when TK needed him to be and stood back and let TK stand on his own when that time came. But TK knows that great things doesn't last, not for him at least. 

He doesn't know when the dark clouds started to hang over his head, blocking out the sunshine and making him feel numb again.  
But he knows what sets it off; he doesn't love Alex anymore, he doesn't and he doesn't think about Alex as his soulmate anymore, TK knows he's not, but that doesn't stop the ache in his chest and it doesn't stop his stomach from turn when he sees the post on Instagram.

A wedding invitation; Alex and Mitchell, to be married in a few months. He's supposed to meet Carlos for dinner in an hour but all he wants to do is to crawl into bed. His actual first thought thought was a burning sensation; the nag and pull to get high, he craved that release but he can't let his dad down; not again. So goes to bed. The numbness makes him feel more tired than he's ever been.

He doesn't remember falling asleep but he's awake to a quite knock on his door. "Dad?"

"No" he hears Carlos' voice carry through the door "it's Carlos" there's an pause "can I come in?"

He checks the time on his phone, he had a date with Carlos, four hours ago. 20 missed calls and a sting on texts from Carlos and his dad, and rest of the team in on the screen.

"Come in" He sits up and turns on the light. Carlos opens the door, steps in a shuts it again.

"Hey; you okay?" Carlos is dressed up in the nice black button up TK had bought him; he looks handsome and he's smiling softly. TK loves that smile but all he feels right now, is numbness. He doesn't want to feel that way.

"M'fine" he mumbles and pulls the blanket closer, he wanted to shield himself from Carlos' worried gaze.

"I'm glad you're feeling well" he can hear the pain in Carlos' voice, he should hate that, he should hate the fact that he's the reason for it but he can't bring himself to care, or to feel. "Would have liked to know that you'd be bailing on dinner though" Carlos sits on the bed and reaches for his hand but TK pulls it out of his grasp. "Okay" Carlos frowns and TK can feel the tears well up in his eyes, he knows he shouldn't be picking a fight but he wants to feel something, even if it's pain.

"Talk to me; what's going on?" Carlos is patient and kind and he's always looking out for TK and TK hates him for that because he's too good to be true and someday he's going find his own Mitchell and he's going to leave TK's world in shambles too; so he decides Carlos can't do that if he pushes him away first.

"I'm fine just leave" he snaps.

"No" Carlos is stubborn and on most days TK would cave into warmth and his touch and the let him clear the skies and bring the sunshine in but he can't do   
today, not when he knows the inevitable.

"Just go, I don't want to see you anymore" and he knows he's breaking Carlos' heart but better that than his own. "I don't c-care about you and I don't want you to care about me"

"Tyler, you don't mean that" Carlos' voice trembles as he speaks and TK knows he's right, he doesn't mean that and he doesn't want to mean that but he's so numb and broken and it's better for both of them if this ended now.

"I do" he doesn't mean to cry, but he does.

"Look at me and tell me, tell me you don't care"

Looking up and saying those words are the hardest thing TK has ever had to do "I don't care about you, I don't want to see you anymore" and then the numbness is replaced with the pain.

Carlos is kind and understanding and TK hates how much the tear on Carlos cheek wrecks him. Carlos nods and doesn't say anything because if TK wants him to go he will. He stands up and reaches into his back pocket, dropping a small velvet bag on to the bed. "I bought that for you, it was a little something to celebrate our 3 months together"

He doesn't look back, and it breaks TKs heart and he has to remind himself that what he wanted, he wanted Carlos gone. And now that he is; the wreaking wretched feeling on heart ache sets in and it's worst than the night Alex left him.

He knows getting high isn't an option, so he sits in bed and he lets the tears out; he's weak, and he's in love but he can't allow himself to go down that road again.  
When the tears subside and the hollowness rips through his chest he reaches for the bag. A silver necklace falls out when he open it and upturn it on the bed, it was nothing special but brings another wave of sadness.

A few weeks back the necklace he usually wore somehow broke and got lost in a fire. That night he pouted and complained about it to Carlos.

Carlos was always attentive to his complains and whatever he needed. But he had too many broken pieces and Carlos deserved so much better, someone who didn't have dark clouds chasing them.

He doesn't sleep that night, and he doesn't go into work the next day. Or the day after that. "Are you sure you don't want to go to the hospital?"

"I'm fine dad, just need sometime at home" he fakes a cough but he knows his dad isn't buying it.  
"Do you want me to ask Michelle to come over? Check you out? Make sure nothings wrong?" Owen knows his son is hiding something but he doesn't push.

TK shakes his head no "go captain, the team needs you"

"Should I at least ask Carlos to come check on you?"  
TK freezes, his dad never liked any of his boyfriends, until Carlos. They had bonded over bbq in the backyard and harassing TK for his own well-being. "Um Carlos and I broke up dad"

"Oh" Owen frowns "that would explain why he wasn't on any calls yesterday"

TK doesn't say anything, he just zeroed in is attention on the coffee cup in hand

"I'm sorry son, I really thought he was a good guy" Owen can't wrap his mind as to why they'd break up, TK was happy and he figured Carlos was too, with all the time they spent together.

"He is-he's a great guy actually" TK smiled, a fresh set of tears welling in his eyes. "He's amazing, he's so amazing dad and I'm-I'm so broken he' didn't deserve that. Doesn't deserve someone like me, he deserves so much better than what I can offer"

Owen hugs his son and holds him close "TK, it's okay to be broken and it's okay to let someone put the pieces back together"

"I can't let him do that, he shouldn't have to fix me"

"Have you asked him what he wants?"

"No, but-" Owen cuts him off before he can say more

"Son, if you see the way that boy looks at you, you'd understand that he loves you broken or not, and it's not fair to him that you'd push him away, not when you love him too"  
-TK spent most of the day mulling over what his dad said. He loved Carlos, he knew that much. But he didn't expect for Carlos to love him back.

By the time the sun had set, he found himself at Carlos front door, ringing the bell.

"Hey" the door opens a few minutes later and he can't see that Carlos is a mess. Curls unkept and dark shadow beneath his eyes.

"What are you doing here Tyler?"

"Can we talk?"

"I don't know, can we?" Carlos isn't looking at him and it breaks TK a little more "the last time I tried talking to you, you weren't very interested in having a proper conversation"

"Carlos, I know just give me five minutes, please" he pleads and prays that Carlos doesn't slap the door shut in his face  
"Five minutes" Carlos pushes the door open and step aside to let him in.

They stand on opposite sides on the living room. Not so long ago they're laughter filled the small space as they shared stories of their work day, TK had his head in Carlos' lap as his boyfriend play with his hair. The memory alone brought a smile to TK face.

"Carlos" he takes a deep breath and tries to string a coherent thought together but words seem to fail him.

Carlos doesn't answer, he just stands there with his arms across and his face blank and then TK realizes that how selfish he had been. He had thought about protecting his heart he never thought about Carlos or how much hurt he was inflicting.

"I care" he says softly "I care a lot and I thought I was doing the right thing" he fidgets nervously with the hem of his hoodie "I love you, and it scared me because I know you love me too and I'm not enough I've never been enough and I know that one day like Alex you'd realize that you don't want to be with someone that's broken and you'd find someone who truly deserves all of your kindness and love and I nearly died the last time that happened and I know if it happens again I will"  
"Tyler-"

"Just let me finish" TK slowly walks over to Carlos and takes his hand "but I got it wrong, you're not Alex. You're so much better and I've been letting my fears of what could happen keep me from letting my guard down completely and it's not fair to you and I know you deserve someone better but I want to be the person you love"

"You are the person I love idiot" Carlos takes a step and closes the distance between them "I've never cared that you're broken, I never cared that a part of you will always be guarded. I want to be with you despite all of that. I'm not perfect either, and I love you Tyler, broken pieces and all"

"Don't punish us for being human and being in love" Carlos pressed his forehead against TKs "let us have a real shot at this, I know we can make it work if you just let it happen"

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, please leave a comment and kudo.


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